Mondayed (in which there is tiredness and squeeing)

So, like, I still have a cold, and it sucks. Friday night I was feeling better, and in fact didn’t even succumb to the Nyquil-Drugged Sleep of the Damned. Normally the first night I can go w/o Nyquil is a clear sign that I’m on the mend. Not this time. I suppose I could’ve been gentler with myself at Darach Anniversary (which was a lovely, if small, event—the day was beautiful and the friends wonderful), but really, most of what I did was sit in pavilions and chat with the above-mentioned wonderful friends. And eat. Whole wheat artisan bread from Trader Joe’s, Dubliner and Red Dragon cheeses, apples, salami, and then Mongolian BBQ for supper. Nom.

Whereupon Sunday involved me largely lying around moaning, too limp and snozzly to even think very hard. I did manage to do some ebook promo, but that was about it. Oh, and we had to go to Home Depot. It was tiring.

I’ve been pretty draggy today, too, and stressed about all the things that aren’t getting done while I collapse under the weight of icky-sickyness. So, dammit, I’m going to list all the good things that have happened/are happening!

• A friend says she’s snapping up each one of my stories as fast as I’m putting them up. That’s love! I feel all warm and gooey inside. (No, not that way! Or that way, either! Sheez.)
• Kristine Kathryn Rusch, a writer I’m proud to call one of my mentors (and for whom I’ve been a fan-girl reader for years), listed one of my stories in her latest Recommended Reading column. I’m…gobsmacked.
• We got tickets to a taping of Jimmy Kimmel Live, with Nathan Filion as one of the guests!  ::cue running around in small circles, hands flapping excitedly::
• I’ve got not one but two appearances this week! First, visit my booth at Mom’s Nite Out at the Ventura Harbor this Thursday from 4–7 pm. I’ll be doing two readings/discussions at 4:15 pm and 6:30 pm. Focus is on romantic and spicy.  ;-)  Second, I’ll be part of a panel discussion and signing A Little Night Music at the Burbank Book Festival on Saturday at the Buena Vista Branch Library.
• OMG! As I was writing this, I got an email about a story acceptance that made me so excited, I swear to you I clapped both hands over my  mouth and made a noise I don’t think I’ve ever made before. “Lost Souls” will appear in Steamlust: Steampunk Erotic Romance, edited by the inestimable Kristina Wright and coming from Cleis Press. Squee-effing-squee!* (Look at that steamy cover!)
• Even though the last 1/3 of it needs work (mostly to fit the world details), the editor really liked my fantasy work-for-hire story, and I’m looking forward to not only redoing the ending, but sending him more proposals for that world and another one he’s editing for!
• Homemade Greek pizza (pesto, mozzarella, feta, tomato, red onion, whole wheat crust) is in the oven, salads are ready, and we’re having a date night. Bye, ya’ll!

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*(I’m not sure why I’m especially excited about “Lost Souls,” although being in a steampunk antho is pretty exciting on its own. I think I just didn’t have any sense of whether the story hung together or not, so I had no sense of whether it would make the cut. So, yay!)

Free story! "From Bitter to Sweet"

Free story!

"From Bitter to Sweet" by Andrea Dale

An erotic lesbian short-short story about breakups, new love, and chocolate. Go ahead—savor it. Let it melt on your tongue….
“From Bitter to Sweet” originally appeared in Got a Minute? 60 Second Erotica (Cleis Press, 2007)

Read it free in a variety of electronic formats at Smashwords

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And yet another sexy story!

"A Sensitive Sole" by Andrea Dale

I pulled out the feathers and went to work on her vulnerable soles. Her entire body went rigid, but she didn’t try to escape, didn’t try to squirm away, oh no. She was in heaven. I turned the vibrator on high and watched the fireworks begin….

“A Sensitive Sole” originally appeared in The Sexiest Soles: Erotic Stories About Feet and Shoes anthology (Alyson Books, 2006)

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

Burbank Book Festival (come see me!)

I'll be on a panel discussion and also signing A Little Night Music this coming Saturday at the Burbank Book Festival. If you're in the area, stop by and say hi!

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Burbank Book Festival 
May, 7, 2011 
1:00 PM 
Buena Vista Branch Library
300 N. Buena Vista St.
For more information call: 818.238.5620 

The City of Burbank will be celebrating its 100th anniversary this year. To coincide with Burbank's centennial celebration, the Burbank Public Library will host a mini-book festival at our Buena Vista Branch Library from 1-4 PM on Saturday, May 7th. The goal of the festival is twofold: to spotlight Burbank's authors who have either self-published their book(s) or published through traditional avenues, giving them the venue to sell their books; and to encourage aspiring authors by offering information on writers' organizations and self-publishing opportunities.

Overdone

Yesterday, I overdid it. Clearly. I actually went to bootcamp and did what I considered a light workout, and it felt healing to be in the sun and fresh air (I realized I hadn’t left the house since I got home Sunday night, except to visit the kitlings). But then we had hair appts and went to Trader Joe’s afterwards, and I then spent the rest of the afternoon on the sofa, watching mindless TV and reading Entertainment Weekly and playing games on my iPhone. Urgle.

So today I eschewed bootcamp* and stayed inside, except for (a) walking half a block to the dentist to get a mold made for my new mouth guard and (b) visiting the kitlings, and although I felt wibbly and mushy for parts of the day, I still managed to get a fair amount done (gently, with many rest breaks in between).

If you’re waiting for an email from me, please be patient. I got through something like 30 work emails and 30 personal emails. Srsly. Dudes.

Also, in case anyone was wondering, I’m neither staying up nor getting up early for the royal wedding. I’m confident there will be enough recaps to amuse me later in the day!

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*By “eschewed bootcamp” I mean I sent Ken in my place. He’s started working out with us, and took my spot on Tuesday, too. Poor guy started this on a four-session week, and he’s feeling it. But I’m so proud of him for diving in and focusing on his health!

Indoors and out - new stories available

Soul's Road Press some new Andrea Dale stories available: One that takes place in the big city and two set in the great outdoors. Enjoy!

"Come to My Window"

Small-town girl Katy craves the big city, the bright lights, the energy and passion…and the woman who would introduce it all to her. She finds all that and more in sophisticated Emilie, who presses her naked against a window and forces her to face her deepest, darkest desires. A lesbian short story “packed full of hot steamy sex.”

"'Come to my Window' by Andrea Dale is another story that I found refreshing and well written. It's short, about 9 pages, but it's packed full of hot steamy sex in a unique and fun setting - pressed against a window overlooking the city of New York. Who wouldn't have an orgasm with that kind of view, not to mention the excitement of possibly of being seen in the act."
— outinprint.net

"Further spankings and a dose of Gallic humiliation is administered in Andrea Dale's 'Come to my Window,' a sort of coming of age story filled with revelations and humiliations while having one’s bottom pleasantly blistered."
— eroticarevealed.com

“Come to My Window” originally appeared in Where the Girls Are: Urban Lesbian Erotica (Cleis Press, 2009)
Available in a variety of electronic formats

Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

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"In Flight"

When you’ve been screwed by an ex, it’s hard to trust again. It takes a red-tailed hawk named Rudy and a sexy falconer named Pam to teach a broken woman how to respect herself and love again. A spicy-sweet lesbian love story.

“In Flight” originally appeared in Best Lesbian Love Stories: Summer Flings (Alyson Publications, 2007) and was republished in Best Lesbian Romance 2009 (Cleis Press, 2009)

“Andrea Dale's ‘In Flight’ has metaphorical power.”
— Seattle Gay News

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"After the Rain"

Can a homebody Adirondack hotel clerk find happiness with a gregarious world-traveling Australian? Or will their erotic encounter in the rain-dappled forest be the extent of their relationship? A sexy and touching lesbian short story.

“After the Rain” originally appeared in Travelrotica for Lesbians: Erotic Travel Adventures(Alyson Books, 2006)

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

Prescription

Sometimes, when you’re sick, the best thing to do is to blow off being remotely produtive, curl up on the sofa with Chinese takeout and wine, and spend the evening watching bad movies (Tenacious D in the Pick of Destiny) and good TV (Bones and Doctor Who) with your beloved.

I do believe I’ll feel better tomorrow….

Lurgified but not completely down for the count

Well, yesterday was largely a Total Fail, due to my inability to accept that when I’m sick, I simply can’t do as much. This seems self-evident, but it is to everyone but me…. Part of the problem is that towards the end of my trip, I was being as productive as I could along with everything else I was doing (spending time w/my sister in the hospital, driving my mom from GA to NY, etc.), and I felt good and got psyched about continuing that productivity in spades once I was home and didn’t have all the other stuff to do. The psyched part of my brain overrode the logical part that was trying to say “You’re sick. Don’t try to do absolutely everything.”

Probably going to the concert last night wasn’t the best idea, but man, let me tell you, Robert Plant has still got it, baby. He was amazing. And it was fabulous to spend time with Kelly and Richard.

Oh, and the Santa Barbara Bowl? Stunning venue. Nothing like watching twilight settle over the ocean and a hawk chasing the wind currents above the stage during the opening act….

Anyway, all I really did yesterday was…

• worked on spreadsheet for epubbed stories
• dealt with some personal emails
• worked on event announcement for CP Prize/poked some people for info
• sent some emails re: CP Prize
• a little unpacking/organizing
• sent Ken to Roxsbury Deli to bring me matzo chicken soup for lunch
• dinner with Kelly & Richard
• Robert Plant concert at the Hollywood Bowl

So this is what I'm looking at for today:

Writing

• work on Out of the Frying Pan
• Blackwood House edits
• promo latest stories available
• OWN email
• if time/energy, other writing-related email
• if time/energy, blog post

Personal

• deal with at least 20 emails (personal/SCA/etc.) – already in progress
• send Ken to Roxsbury Deli for more soup – he’s taking my spot at bootcamp training today, and going to pick that up on the way home. Yay.
• send some emails re: CP Prize
• work on the application for the Hollywood Walk of Fame star for Styx
• work on Blackfox Awards for local newsletters
• more organizing/bill paying/scheduling of things
• make some phone calls (may slough those off ‘til tomorrow ::sniffle cough::)

Just a few things on the To Do list....

I got home from my trip to GA/NY last night, and waited up for Ken to get home even though I was exhausted. I got a few things accomplished, but not much, thanks the exhaustion. Still, we got to bed relatively early (for us) and I figured I’d sleep the Nyquil-drugged sleep of the damned and be able to hit the ground running this morning.

The massive tension headache that turned the tendons in my neck to throbbing bars of steel had other plans for me.

So I’m still tired, and draggy from the cold, but the fact is, I have a metric buttload of things to do, and they’ve got to get done, no matter how crappy I feel. Ken’s going to have to take on more of the burden of house stuff this week, and thankfully he’s okay with that.

To keep me honest, here’s what I need to do today:

Writing

• work on Out of the Frying Pan
• Blackwood House edits
• OWN email
• other writing-related email
• work on spreadsheet for epubbed stories
• if time, blog post

Personal

• deal with at least 30 emails (personal/SCA/etc.)
• work on event announcement for CP Prize/poke some people for info
• send some emails re: CP Prize
• work on the application for the Hollywood Walk of Fame star for Styx
• make some phone calls (may slough those off ‘til tomorrow ::sniffle cough::)
• work on Blackfox Awards for local newsletters
• more unpacking/organizing
• send Ken to Roxsbury Deli to bring me matzo chicken soup for lunch
• dinner with Kelly & Richard
• Robert Plant concert at the Hollywood Bowl

Two more stories up at Soul's Road Press

"How the Little Mermaid Got Her Tail Back"

Ella believed her kinky desires were perverted and sick. It takes a special man like Philip to teach her that she isn’t wrong, or different, or broken. Through bondage and exhibitionism, he gives his little mermaid her tail back. A deliciously sexy short story by a legendary erotica heavy-hitter.

“How the Little Mermaid Got Her Tail Back” (in a sushi restaurant!) is as beguiling as a siren.
—Erin O’Riordan, Urban Fantasy Writers

I really loved the tale “How The Little Mermaid Got Her Tail Back” by Andrea Dale. It is a lovely recounting of how a broken woman regains her power and womanhood through the love of a special man. Truly a special tale.
—Airen Wolf, Eden Fantasys

Of all the stories, I would say the most intriguing was “How the Little Mermaid Got Her Tail Back.”
—Monica Solomon, The Romance Readers Connection

“How the Little Mermaid Got Her Tail Back” first appeared in Fairy Tale Lust: Erotic Fantasies for Women (Cleis Press, 2010), which received 4.5 stars from Romantic Times, and was republished in Best Bondage Erotica 2011 (Cleis Press, 2010).

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Always a Bridesmaid"

Even though Veronica was a shrewish harpy, I’d always lusted after her. Now I had the opportunity to make this bridezilla pay…in a deliciously kinky way. A hot-and-heavy lesbian short story by a legendary erotica heavy-hitter.

“Always a Bridesmaid” originally appeared in Coming Together: Against the Odds (Phaze Books, 2009)

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

Run, Charlie, run!

So we get home to upstate NY after two days of driving from GA, and I tell Mom to get the water turned on while I unpack the car. I tell her I’m leaving the door open to (a) air the condo out and (b) I don’t have to put things down to open the door every time I come in with a load of stuff.

She says “No, mice will get in!”

I’m all, “Mom, we’re both stomping around right by the door. Any mice will be scared off.”

Then I go back out for a load, and all I can envision is a bunch of mice under the bush by the front door suddenly perking up and going “Hey! Hey! The front door is fucking open! Gogogo! Charlie, Reg, Benedict, get in there! Run like the wind!”

(I don’t know why the mice are British expatriates. Just go with it.)

What I’m Working On, April 2011 edition

Not quite a Me!Me!, but various authors* have been listing, or list on a regular basis, the projects they’re working on, and since I find it fascinating, I thought I’d do the same. (You might not find it fascinating. Let me know.) Perhaps not regularly (I can’t quite seem to shoehorn concepts like regular and schedule into my life), but occasionally. Or, at least, now.

Out of the Frying Pan, aka the manuscript that will not die. Status: effing tweaking. An editor asked for tweaks. Teresa and I discuss, get some tweaks done, then get sucked into other projects with deadlines and payments and whatnot; lather, rinse, repeat. We’re so close, too. One scene she needs to write, and I need to knit it all together, and then it’s outta here.

Blackwood House. Status: manuscript cleanup/upload prep. Time to get this sweet paranormal romance off my hard drive and out into the world. Yes, I wrote a sweet romance. Nearly killed me, but I did it. Since it was rejected by the only market it fit into (since it’s only 50K), there it languished, occasionally surfacing to meekly inquire whether I was going to add those half-thought-out subplots so it could become A Real Book. Well, the answer is clearly “no,” because I have way too many new books to write to spend time going backwards—and because it works as it is. It’s been through copyediting; next step is dealing with those edits and getting the manuscript ready to upload as an ebook. Oh, and get possible cover photos to Phae for the cover design. Then, after it’s up for sale, I’ll work on the POD version. (That may not get far until July when I take a publishing workshop that will cover the process.)

Untitled story for mystery contest. Status: idea obtained. (Actually, the idea was obtained last year before the contest, but I never got around to writing it.) Mystery story set in New England, due May 1.

Untitled Custom Erotica Source stories. Status: accepted assignment. Two related 3K stories due end of May. I wrote a novella for this customer previously, and these stories will be in the same vein, so they should be easy enough.

Work-for-Hire fantasy story proposals. Status: percolating. I turned in the first story and want to get a couple more proposals off to the editor, plus there’s another universe I’d love to write in, so I want to write some proposals up for that, too. I’d like to have those out by early May.

Epubbed stories. Status: ongoing. I’ve got something like 25 up now, and I’m selling an average of 3 stories a day via Amazon (I haven’t tallied Barnes & Noble or Smashwords closely). I think I have about 80 total that I have the erights for, so I’m gonna keep putting ‘em up until I run out and have to write new ones (although I do have some unpublished stories that have run their course of pro markets and will thus be next in the queue). I also want to start bundling them into e-collections and POD collections. But right now, I have five stories in progress to get up in the next 1–2 weeks.

There’s more—there’s always more—but this is what’s on my plate for the next few weeks.

Are we having fun yet?!

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*My favorite is Seanan McGuire, who makes me head hurt in a groovy and awestruck way. Scary and inspiring in equal measure. CE Murphy has posted some doozies, too, and Laura Anne Gilman is pretty amazing.

Wow! Great review!

A reader posted this amazing review of my story "From Bitter to Sweet" on Amazon:

Andrea Dale's "From Bitter to Sweet" is snappy, sexy, and a little sarcastic - and the best piece of breakup erotica I have ever read. A little angry and very hot, Dale's smart narrator makes her way from a breakup to new love, and it's an edible journey the entire time (and exactly what I needed as I deal with my own emotional upheaval). 

Thank you, kind reader!

The story appears in Got a Minute? 60 Second Erotica (Cleis Press, 2007; edited by the amazing Alison Tyler) and will soon be available as a free ebook from Soul's Road Press!

Two Wild West-themed stories from Soul's Road Press

"Lily la Rouge, or The Ghost of Erotic Presents"

Can the ghost of a Wild West madame help a woman feel sexy again and reignite the lost spark in her marriage? A sexy and romantic short story by a legendary erotica heavy-hitter.

“Lily la Rouge” originally appeared at Fishnet.com, 2005.

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Queens Up"

In this fan favorite short story, Josephine’s father has lost the family ranch—and Josephine’s hand in marriage—in a poker game gone bad. Josephine plots to win everything back by disguising herself as a man to compete in a high-stakes poker game herself…and her secret lover, Margaret, intends to make sure no one suspects Josephine’s deception.

“Queens Up” originally appeared in LAMBDA Literary Award Winner Lesbian Cowboys: Erotic Adventures (Cleis Press, 2009) and republished in Best Lesbian Romance 2010 (Cleis Press, 2010).

“In the silent-support and enduring understanding romance department, it's hard to beat Andrea Dale's historical ‘Queens Up.’ The setting of the American West is cleanly crafted and the time period of Westward Expansion accurate. The women, Josephine and Margaret, are depicted with the determination and intelligence to work within the ‘big picture’ of society’s expectations. There's no blow-up women's lib single moment, so frequent in stories set in historical times, just a strong current of thinking fast on their feet that brings these women alive.”
—Lara Zielinsky, LZFiction

“’Queens Up’ by Andrea Dale is the tale of Josephine who uses her skill at poker to undo her father’s mistakes and reclaim a home for herself and Margaret. This clever historical tale flows beautifully with excellent characters and exceptional prose.”
—Emily, Three Dollar Bill Reviews

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

Recommended Reading, November & December 2010

Recommended Reading, November

The Freelancer’s Survivor Guide, Kristine Kathryn Rusch. Ever considered ditching your day job and working for yourself, in any capacity (not just writing)? Then you have to read this book. Rusch has been freelancing for years, she’s made all the mistakes and learned from them, and in this book she tells you what they were, what she learned, and how she came out the other side. She posted each chapter on her blog, and in fact wrote chapters she never even intended to based on comments and questions she received. You can still read it there, or you can buy it as a print book or ebook. Believe me, it’s worth every penny!

Except the Queen, Jane Yolen and Midori Snyder. Devoted faerie sisters Meteora and Serana anger their Queen and are banished to the mortal realm. Now middle-aged (with all its attendant creaks and pains and the lack of the breathtaking beauty of youth and fey) and, worse, separated from each other, they struggle to survive in an alien world and find each other again. But the humans they befriend make it clear that there’s far more going on than a simple banishment…. I’d read the novella version of this in Marvin Kayes Fair Folk anthology, which won a World Fantasy Award (and which itself is worth reading for Tanith Lee’s contribution) and was thrilled to discover they’d expanded it to novel form.

Recommended Reading, December

December was a roundly crappy month for me, so that may have colored how I felt about what I read that month. Maybe some books were better than I realized, but I wasn’t in the right headspace. I did read several good things, but ones I didn’t think were great enough to mention here. So I only have one…

Maybe This Time, Jennifer Crusie. I have been vibrating with excitement for this book ever since Crusie started talking about it on her blog. It’s her modern take on The Turn of the Screw, which a stronger heroine and Crusie’s funny, breathless style of prose. Which is not to say it’s not damn creepy in places, because it is, and there were times when I wished Ken were home while I was reading it…. Seriously, you’ve got ghosts, romance, a crumbling castle transported to the Midwest more than a century ago, and the usual assortment of secondary characters both hilarious and disturbing. What’s not to love?

Free fantasy story available!

"What Dragons Prefer" — free fantasy short story from Soul's Road Press!

A dragon slayer arrives to rescue a threatened town, but the real threat and the dragon’s true desires are not necessarily one and the same.

“What Dragons Prefer” first appeared in Marion Zimmer Bradley’s Fantasy Magazine, Fall 1994; and republished in Dragons: A Celebration of the Greatest of Mythical Creatures, January 1996.

Available free in a variety of electronic formats from Smashwords
(includes formats for Amazon Kindle and Barnes & Noble Nook).

Ideas and inspiration

“Where do you get your ideas?”

It’s the question every writer hates. (Well, I kind of hate “Have I read anything you’ve written” even more, because how stupid a question is that? Do I look like a mind reader?!)

The fact is, it’s hard to pinpoint where an idea came from. It can be as vague and fleeting as a song lyric or an offhand comment or a painting or even something I’ve read. Not in the sense of plagiarizing, of course—in the sense of sparking a completely different idea. ::cue brain whooshing sideways::

Themed anthologies are always a challenge. A fun challenge, but a challenge nonetheless. Kate Wilhelm said that you should throw out the first three ideas you come up with, because those are what everyone else will think of. At the same time, though, you can’t go too far off from the theme, or your story won’t fit the anthology.

For example…

• Where the Girls Are: Urban Lesbian Erotica: I figured everyone was going to pick New York, Los Angeles, London, or Paris. I grabbed Montreal. Go me!
• Rubber Sex: I wrote about a retro bathing cap, rather than rubber suits or rubber underwear, or, well, you know.
• Sex on the Move: my coauthor* and I threw out planes, trains, and automobiles, and set our story in the back of a Brinks truck. Seriously.

So when it came to brainstorming for Lesbian Cops: Erotic Investigations, I immediately nixed the idea of a character getting pulled over for speeding…or, for that matter, anything involving a character getting arrested (whether for real or pretend).  I pondered for a while without having any idea spark for me, although I did cross the street in front of a police car and spent far too long ogling the pretty Hispanic female officer at the wheel.

The question really came down to, how do the cop and her (sexual) partner know each other?

That’s when a I remembered a real-life, inspiring story.

A few years ago, my best friend’s daughter heard about police dogs who needed special harnesses. With the help of her mom, her teacher, and the other girls in her fifth-grade class, they raised money to pay for the equipment.

Dudes. Dudes. How awesome is that? My friend is raising her daughter so well.

Obviously I tweaked some details (I changed the daughter’s name to Ashley, plus my best friend is not a single-mom lesbian—I imagine her husband would be surprised if she were—and I upped the ante by having the fundraiser be for bullet-proof vests for the police dogs), but the sentiment was the same: Kids can surprise you and rock your world with their generous hearts. At the same time, it’s hard to navigate any new relationship when you have a child…something my characters had to figure out.

Oh, and the real-life Ashley? She’s now a GBLT activist at her high school.

Awesome.

*My frequent coauthor is Teresa Noelle Roberts, who also has a story in Lesbian Cops: Erotic Investigations!

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Here’s a completely safe for work excerpt from my story, “Charity and Splendor”:

We enlisted the help of Ashley’s teacher, Mr. Schindling, and the other dog-crazy girls in her class. The girls brainstormed ways to make money, came up with a logo, brought the enthusiasm. I agreed to handle the aspects the girls couldn’t: opening a Paypal account, for example, and sending a press release to the local paper.

But all that was after I called the police department and set up an appointment for Ashley and I to meet with the head of the K-9 unit.

“Rosa Mendez,” she said, holding out her hand.

“Monica Westberg.”

We shook briefly, and then she led us to a small office.

She had that cop demeanor, not quite militaristic, but still with squared shoulders, no-nonsense expression, and clipped speech. It’s not that she was unfriendly—hey, even the cops that had pulled me over once (okay, maybe twice) for speeding had been polite when they’d handed me my ticket—but she was businesslike to the extreme. Just a quick smile for Ashley.

Everything changed, though, when I let Ashley explain why we were there.

It was the smile that did me in. The astonished grin that blossomed across her face, the dimple on the left side, the flash of light in her dark eyes. “Are you serious?” she said.

“Absolutely,” I said. “Of course, we won’t do anything without the full support of the department.”

“We’d be insane not to,” Rosa said. “Ashley, you are an extraordinary young woman.”

Ashley blushed and ducked her head, and I liked Rosa even more.

We talked about getting some information and materials from her about the K-9 program, and then she asked if we’d like to meet Duke, the dog who’d been shot.

I thought Ashley was going to vibrate out of her anime hoodie at the very prospect.

Duke was hanging out with the other dogs that weren’t out on patrol with their handlers, although he had a private enclosure since he was recovering. His tail started wagging as soon as he saw Rosa, and if she’d had a tail, it would’ve wagged, too.

She talked about Duke with deep affection, and I heard her voice quaver once before she cleared her throat and mentioned the surgery he’d gone through. She kept the details fuzzy for Ashley’s sake.

And all the while I was thinking, Dammit, I have the worst timing when it comes to crushes.

Well, this was going to be awkward.

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Want more insights into the stories that appear in Lesbian Cops: Erotic Investigations? The contributors are blogging for the first half of April about their stories, about hot policewoman, about uniforms…you name it, we’re talking about it!

For a full list and links to each entry, check out editor Sacchi Green’s blog. Enjoy!

What I really want

So, my birthday’s coming up, and I meant to post this earlier, but hopefully there’s still time.

I don’t need presents, really. I’ve got Stuff. If you’ve already gone to my wish list and bought me Stuff, then thank you in advance! But if you haven’t, may I make a couple of wee suggestions?

1. What I want, what I really want, is this: If you’ve read something of mine and enjoyed it, post a review. Give it stars, however many you think it deserves. (If you hated it, I’d rather you didn’t post a review, but that’s up to you!) Post it at the site where you bought it, or post it on your blog, or poke one of your friends until s/he buys it. Yes, I’m asking you to promo my work. It’s my birthday, and that’s my wish.

2. If you’ve got the cash, buy something of mine as a gift for a friend. Would So-and-So really love A Little Night Music? Did Whosiwhatsit just get a Kindle or Nook and is looking for some fun reads?

3. Also, and only if you’ve got the cash, I’m missing copies of some of my own work. I try to have at least two copies: one for my shelves and one in a safe location away from my house in case of catastrophe. (Yes, I know an author who’s house burned down, years ago, and he still hasn’t managed to get his hands on a copy of everything he’s published in.)

Here’s a list of everything I don’t have a second copy of:

• Alison's Wonderland
• Black Lace Quickies 2
• Caught Looking
• Coming Together: Against the Odds (bonus! The proceeds go to charity.)
• Coming Together: At Last (bonus! The proceeds go to charity.)
• Deathgrip: Exit Laughing  (good luck with this one! It was a print-on-demand... Fancy a challenge?)
• Erotic Fantasy: Tales of the Paranormal
• Haunted Hearths and Sapphic Shades
• He's On Top
• Liebesreisen
• Love on the Dark Side
• The Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica 7
• The Mammoth Book of Best New Erotica 8
• The Mammoth Book of Lesbian Erotica
• The Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes (UK edition)
• The Mammoth Book of Threesomes and Moresomes (US edition)
• The MILF Anthology
• Scharfe Krallen
• Sex and Music
• Sex at the Sports Club
• Sex in Public
• Sex in the Kitchen
• Sex in Uniform
• Sex With Strangers
• Sword & Sorceress XVI
• Vermont Voices II
• Vermont Voices III
• The Witching Hour, 2nd ed

Used books are fine as long as they're "like new" or otherwise in great shape.

If possible, buying them via my Amazon store gives me a wee little kickback and takes no more time for you (because I've included links—just clickety-click!). However, if you have a strong preference for another store, that's totally groovy, too.

If I get a lot of one particular title, I'll put some aside for giveaways and prizes. (I do plan to do some of those soon, too!)

Thanks, and have a safe and happy day on my birthday!

What? Me? You know who I am?!

So. Here’s the thing. I’m sure it’s blindingly clear from this blog (as well as various other social media, and even talking to me) that I’m proud of the work I do. I have no problem advertising my work in a cheerful and nonpushy way. (I don’t want this blog or my FB or Twitter or whatever to become All About Dayle’s Latest Publication, because even I know that’s booooring.) I want to let ya’ll know when a new story is released, because if you don’t know it’s been released, then you don’t know you have the option to go buy it. I don’t expect you to buy everything I have available, especially if it’s not to your taste. I assume nothing. I just put the info out there.

Which is what the writing life is like, really. I sit here in my study and I make shit up, and then I send it out in the world and hope that it clicks with an editor and s/he will buy it. I get a happy squee moment when I sell something, and again when I get the check (because this is my job, after all) and the comp copies. A positive review is a bonus, and someone taking the time to personally let me know they liked something is a bonus with awesome sauce on top.

But even still, I don’t assume People Out There notice. I’m not sure how to explain this, except to give you an anecdote from high school. I was shy, growing up. (People who know me now are no doubt falling over in astonishment, but it’s true. Painfully shy.) I hung out with friends and I did things I enjoyed doing, but I didn’t assume people other than my friends were aware of my existence. Then, towards the end of senior year, yearbooks came out. And all of these people started asking me to sign their yearbooks. People I “knew” in terms of “I’ve been going to this not-very-big school since first grade” but not in terms of “I hang out with you.”

And honestly, all I could think was, “What? Me? You know who I am?!”

(Now, the fact was, I was A Joiner. There’s a picture of me on something like 20 pages of my junior yearbook, because I was in ::deep breath:: band chorus pep band marching band special chorus yearbook newspaper Olympics of the Mind Student Council swim team and other things I’m forgetting right now. I shouldn’t have been surprised people knew me. I was always there, even if I was mostly sitting quietly in the corner. Working on my novel.)

I still get this way, though, sometimes. I send out my stories and sometimes someone buys them and they get published. I don’t expect or assume anything beyond that.

So awhile back, when Violet Blue included me in a list of “legendary erotica heavy-hitters,” what I hit was the floor. In shock.

My point (and yes, you’ll be glad to know I’m getting to the point) is that even that didn’t really clue me in that People Out There notice.

I recently learned that an anthology I have a story in has been nominated for a LAMBDA Literary Award. (I’ve been in several nominated anthologies in the past, including on that won in its category, wooh!). “Queens Up” was reprinted in Best Lesbian Erotica 2010, and I’ve got my fingers crossed that lovely editor Radclyffe is recognized with a win.

(I’d like to point out also that “Queens Up” originally appeared in Lesbian Cowboys: Erotic Adventures, which was the Lammy winner in its category last year!)

When I heard about the nomination, I clicked through and discovered something. The “Product Description” on Amazon and wherever the book is being sold, which I assume was written by someone at publisher Cleis Press, includes this line: “All readers will enjoy these stories of romance by the best in the genre, including Sommer Marsden, Sacchi Green, Evan Mora, Andrea Dale, and the grand master Radclyffe herself.”

My name is in a list of “best in the genre”?  With those other awesome writers? Bguh?

Go ahead and laugh. I’m used to it. I’m just not used to people noticing….

Looking for a good laugh?

Squee! Soul's Road Press has started making my fantasy and science fiction stories available! They've been doing such a great job with the erotica so I'm chuffed to get these stories out into the world again, too. (Erotica fans, don't worry, there's a lot more of that to, er, come, too!)

(Also: That's right, Alia—stories you can read and enjoy!)
Here's info on the first two:

"If the Shoe Fits"

 Is Prince Charming really interested in Cinderella…or was it her shoes that captured his attention? A “funny (and rather ingenious)” short story (Errant Dreams Reviews).

“Dayle A. Dermatis’s ‘If the Shoe Fits’ is a funny (and rather ingenious) semi-modern twist on Cinderella, in which we find out why that shoe was really so important to everyone.” —Errant Dreams Reviews

“If the Shoe Fits” originally appeared in The Trouble With Heroes (DAW, 2009).

Available in a variety of electronic formats
Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Hell's Belles"

Teaching etiquette to a spoiled debutante can be hell…literally.

“Hell’s Belles” originally appeared in Deathgrip: Exit Laughing (Hellbound Books, 2006).

Available in a variety of electronic formats

Amazon |  Barnes & Noble |  Smashwords