So I ordered the shirt from Café Press. When it arrived, I was sad to see that some of the words bled into the design to such a degree as to be unreadable. While I was sure I'd been able to read Thom's shirt in its entirety, Café Press said the flaw was due to the low quality of the image intially given to them. They agreed to refund my money, and even said I could keep the shirt I'd purchased. Kudos to Café Press.
In an effort to not forget what the shirt says, I provide the text here for your amusement. Please don't copy it without tracking down the original source, which is DJ Rik Emerson in the Portland, OR, area. (Check out Café Press for details.)
So read on, and say with me, hallelujah.
I believe that Han shot first. I believe that Ally Sheedy was hotter before Molly Ringwald cleaned her up. I believe in miniatures, models, claymation, and not revealing the shark until you absolutely have to. I believe that George Lucas, for better or for worse, changed the way we see the world, ourselves, and each other. And I believe that we will someday reach those stars that he himself made visible. I believe that George Lucas is also a narrow-minded, money-grubbing pig-headed slave to the now, who oughtta be locked away from his own creations, lest he do them further harm. I believe that Jean-Luc Picard is the better Starship Captain, but I also believe that James Tiberius Kirk is infinitely more cool. I believe that children standing in line to buy a book at midnight is fantastic; I believe that reading makes you smart—it’s schools that make you dumb. I believe that any episode of Futurama is better than any program featuring a precocious teenager who’s wise beyond their years. I also believe Buffy the Vampire Slayer to be the sole exception that proves this rule. I believe that comic books are an art form, and will someday be recognized as such. I believe that good shows die too young; and crap shows last too long. I believe that boycotts, petitions, and sending the President of Fox lots of candy will never save a program…only heads on spikes will ever do that trick. I believe that Eddie Izzard is the funniest man alive, and I don’t give a good goddamn whether you’ve ever heard of him or not—it’s still true. I believe that a girl who likes movies about zombies is hotter than whoever’s on the cover of Maxim this month. I believe that Beloch ate that fly, and I swear to God that I heard Luke call Leia “Carrie,” and I believe that Samwise Gamgee never quite got the credit he really deserved. I believe in magic, I believe in dreams, I believe in the power of music, movies, and the untold worlds inside an everyday library card. And I do not believe that geeks will inherit the earth; I believe that we already have.