~~ "She has so many aliases, you'd think she was a spy!" ~~

Monday, July 02, 2012

And then Bigfoot drop-kicked Alice Cooper....


“If you can spend a  perfectly useless afternoon in a perfectly useless manner, you have learned how to live.”  —Lin Yutang

Anyone following my Twitter/FB/G+ feeds Ssaturday knows that we abandoned any and all plans to do anything useful that day once I discovered SyFy was running a marathon of their cheesy movies. We grabbed our computers (because you don’t really have to watch the movies constantly) and settled ourselves onto the sofa.

More importantly, it was the one-year anniversary of Ken’s accident. Although we’d talked about doing something to celebrate his being alive (and healthier than he was before the accident!), we never nailed down what to do. What could be better than this?

We started our day with the tail end of Rage of the Yeti, which was just about as awfully good (or wonderfully bad) as the title suggests. We really didn’t have to see the first five-sixths of the movie to follow the plot.

Then it was on to The Lost Tribe, which apparently originally starred Jewel Staite, but then they rewrote/reshot it w/o her, which explains why the movie made little sense. I got a lot of email and online stuff during this one. Near the end, we never bothered unmuting it after a commercial break. Guess you also don’t need to hear these things, either….

The Lost Future appropriately came next. The DVR description promised Intense Sexual Situations (or something like that), but there were NONE, and I was PEEVED. It did have Sean Bean, though, and some other eye candy. During this one, I did some online publishing work.

Partway through Abominable, we mutually agreed that our brains were dribbling out of our ears and it was time to take a break. We made a batch of healthy popsicles (buttermilk, banana, raspberry, and honey), shoved those in the freezer, got out the ground beef and ground turkey to defrost for tonight’s meatloaf, acquired snacks, tidied the kitchen, and resumed our sprawl on the sofa. Ken burned some CDs we’d recently acquired (Amanda Palmer’s Several Attempts to Cover Songs by The Velvet Underground & Lou Reed* for Neil Gaiman as his Birthday Approaches [*and Other Stuff], Sun Domingo’s Songs for End Times [they opened for Marillion and we loved them], and Playing Away, a compilation of songs by members of Marillion with other projects), and then we returned to our orgy of visual media.

Our palate cleanser was The Young Victoria, our latest Netflix disc. Partway through the extras, we paused to make the meatloaf (meatslab, actually, because we had extra meat, so we flattened the whole thing so it would cook in the same amount of time), steamed Brussels sprouts, and salad. We watched an episode of Once Upon a Time with dinner (we’re still catching up on a few series—two more to go to finish out the season on this one).

Then it was on to Bigfoot. Danny Bonaduce! Sherilyn Fenn! Howard Hesseman! Barry Williams! This movie was made of cheesy win even before Bigfoot drop-kicked Alice Cooper. Special effects were awful, acting was dodgy, plot made no sense. But Bigfoot drop-kicked Alice Cooper…!

Wine was involved.

Finally, we also recorded Mega Python Vs. Gateroid, starring Debbie Gibson and Tiffany. I missed this one the first time around and was very sad. As yet, we haven’t had time to watch it, though.

So that was our Saturday. How was yours?

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Wrap't


I just got home from a trip to Atlanta, with one sister and my mom and I visiting my other sister (more on that later), and I’m leaving tomorrow for two Marillion concerts in Hollywood (they haven’t toured the US in 15 years, and I think we got to see them only once when we lived in Wales), so I don’t have time for a proper journal entry.

But!

I’ve lost about 10 lbs and about 4% body fat in the last couple of months, and long story short, several people have asked me about salads and wraps. I love me some salad, boy howdy. Real Salad, not some namby-pamby wilted iceberg lettuce excuse for a salad. Salad with lots of interesting textures and explosions of taste and a tempting variety of colors. Crunchy veggies, a smattering of cheese, healthy fat in the form of avocado, filling protein.

(The word salad now officially is looking weird to me.)

So here you have them.

Salad #1
Good for a small dinner salad or a big entrée salad, the latter depending on how much protein you need.
  • mixed greens of choice
  • spinach
  • fresh herbs if you’ve got them (I love basil)
  • broccoli slaw
  • tomatoes – I love little grape tomatoes, and I cut them in half so it’s easier to stab ‘em with my fork
  • yellow pepper (or if you like green or red or orange, go for it)
  • Persian (Trader Joe’s has them) or English cucumber (why do regular cucumbers have no taste?)
  • thinly sliced red onion
  • half an avocado
  • garbanzo beans, drained and rinsed
  • bleu cheese (I like TJ’s crumbled Salem Bleu)
  • balsamic vinaigrette (see below) 

Salad #2
Good for a big entrée salad because it has more protein. I have this for lunch a lot.
  • same veggies as above
  • delete bleu cheese
  • add feta cheese
  • add Kalamata/Greek olives if you so desire
  • add single-serving packet of tuna
  • delete vinaigrette
  • add a drizzle of extra-virgin olive oil
  • add red wine vinegar to taste

Balsamic Vinaigrette à la Dayle
  • 1 part extra-virgin olive oil to 2 parts balsamic vinegar – I usually do ½ cup oil and 1 cup vinegar, because that fits nicely in the bottle I use. Do what works best for you.
  • some sort of mixed seasoning of your choice. I like Trader Joe’s Italian seasoning mix because it has no added salt and is tasty.
  • dried mustard
  • finely chopped garlic if you want (I don’t because it’s hard to clean out of the bottle)
  • pour oil and vinegar into a measuring cup
  • sprinkle seasoning until it covers the surface of the liquid
  • sprinkle mustard to taste
  • whisk like a mad whisking person
  • decant into a nice bottle for serving

Wrap #1, aka Greek Wrap
  • Trader Joe’s organic whole wheat olive oil wrap
  • hummus (I love Trader Joe’s Mediterranean)
  • spinach
  • fresh basil if you’ve got it
  • thinly sliced red onion
  • sliced grape tomatoes
  • thinly sliced Persian cucumbers
  • Kalamata/Greek olives, roughly chopped
  • crumbled feta
  • sprinkle of red wine vinegar if you remember (I usually forget, dammit)
  • schmear wrap with two tbsp hummus
  • add veggies and feta
  • I like to add the spinach last and pile on as much as I can
  • wrap the wrap, baybee
  • eat up 

Wrap #2, aka Sandwich in a Wrap
  • Trader Joe’s organic whole wheat olive oil wrap
  • stoneground mustard
  • good thin-sliced deli turkey that isn’t full of preservatives and additives and crap
  • veggies of your choice (spinach unless you can’t keep it refrigerated, cucumbers, tomatoes, onion, etc.)
  • half an avocado

Monday, June 18, 2012

Eine Klein Spanking by Clarice Clique

Today I have the pleasure of hosting Clarice Clique on my blog, as part of the Bound by Lust blog tour. Based on the steamy excerpt she's posted below, I'm looking forward to reading her story when I get my comp copies of the anthology! I hope you are, too.
~ ~ ~
I started writing erotic stories to amuse a close friend; a more creative way of flirting, or just me being plain slutty, I’ll let you decide!

That was years ago, but my story included in Bound by Lust, "Eine Klein Spanking," was written in the same way as my very first stories, with one special reader in mind. A friend of mine was going through a hard time, losing both his job and girlfriend in quick succession, and I wrote something that I hope would cheer him up.

"Eine Klein Spanking" is lighter than some of my other erotica, although it focuses on power relationships in BDSM play which is one of my favourite subjects as you’ll soon realise if you read any of my other stories.

I write about BDSM more than anything else, not just for the obvious reason that it is my own particular perversion, but because I like the drama and tension it naturally creates as my characters explore their own and each others’ limits. In ‘Eine Klein Spanking’ Audrey is an experienced sub, but when she falls for her new German neighbour she faces the problem of how to introduce her sexual kinkiness into their sweet romantic relationship. This is a situation a few of my friends have experienced; meeting someone at a fetish night skips all the need for explanation, chatting to the cute guy in the office means that at some point you have to work out if he’s the type that likes to spank or be spanked. I’ve been very lucky and found that my partners are all very open minded however innocent they appear on the outside.

Here is an excerpt from the book to whet your taste, this is Audrey’s first time with her German lover. Enjoy.

 ~ ~ ~ 

In the end my lust beat my patience down and I gave up waiting to be seduced. My first encounters were usually passion fuelled, clothes ripping, affairs that happened in alleyways, on staircases, in toilets, leaving my body raw and bruised. With my new German boyfriend I took his hand and led him upstairs to my bedroom, moved the big pink teddy off the bed, and we lay down together fully clothed and faced each other. I put my arms around him and we kissed, gentle loving kisses. My hands slid down the back of his jeans, I pressed my tongue between his lips and as he responded I moved my hand around to the front and began to slowly wank him. He moaned and rolled onto his back, I undid his belt and pulled his pants down. His cock was even larger than I’d imagined, I didn’t attempt to deep throat it, instead sucking and licking the head while one of my hands squeezed his balls. My other hand pulled up my skirt and I rubbed my thumb over my clit. I was happy tasting him, breathing in the scent of his sex, and waiting for the moment when his confidence and desire grew and he’d put his hands on the back of my head and pushed me down onto the full length of his cock.

 
~ ~ ~ 

And for your continued reading pleasure, here's the full blog tour list (the first name is the host, the second name is the guest):

June 11
Shanna Germain / Welcome

June 12
Janine Ashbless / Andrea Dale  (hey, that's me!)

June 13

June 14
Allison Wonderland / Craig Sorensen

June 15
Lisabet / Shanna Germain

June 18
Andrea Dale / Clarice Clique

June 19
Erotica for All / Kristina Wright

June 20
Alison Tyler/ Alison Tyler

June 21
Nikki Magennis / Allison Wonderland

June 22
Kristina Wright / Kristina Lloyd

June 25
Clarice Clique / Justine Elyot
  
June 26
Vida Bailey / Veronica Wilde

June 27
Veronica Wilde / Teresa Noelle Roberts

June 28
TBD / Alana Noel Voth

June 29
Kristina Lloyd / Nikki Magennis

July 2
Jeremy Edwards / Vida Bailey

July 3
Teresa Noelle Roberts / Janine Ashbless

July 4
Dorla Moorehouse / Review & Excerpt

July 5
Justine Elyot / Donna George Storey

July 6
Shanna Germain / Closing


Friday, June 15, 2012

WOW back atcha

I know that, as an author, I shouldn't read reviews of my work. Everyone says to have a trusted person read your reviews and send you only the good ones—because while a good review is a squee-worthy experience, a bad review has the ability to trump a million good reviews and that's all you remember and focus on.

But I am weak, and sometimes I succumb*, and having just received comp copies of several anthologies containing my stories, I found myself drifting over to Amazon to see how they were faring.

And I saw a review for Lustfully Ever After: Fairy Tale Erotic Romance, that said in part,
I could go on and on, but if I were forced to choose a favorite under pain of torture, I would have to say "Steadfast" by Andrea Dale. Maybe it's just because I've got a little bit of a military fetish thing going on right now (me and Mr. James Jones - we got a thing going on), but WOW. When I write in all caps like that, that means it was a hella powerful story, emotionally, sexually and psychologically. I tip my hat to you, Ms. Andrea Dale.
WOW indeed. I tip my hat to you, Erin O'Riordan, and thank you more than you could know for your kind words. I took some chances with this story—I pushed myself outside of my comfort zone to write in a different style. I didn't know, in the end, whether it worked. When the editor, the lovely Kristina Wright, bought it, for me that was proof that I'd succeeded. A review like this just blows me away, as it reaffirms that challenging myself really did pay off.

---
*and I have no first reader for reviews. Applications welcome. Must be consistent and reliable. And like smut and speculative fiction and other stuff. And be willing to put up with my idiosyncracies.

Saturday, June 09, 2012

Hail the squee!


Now is the time on this blog when I once again squee about a new publication. Because, well, I can’t help it. If you don’t like it…fuck, I don’t know what we’re gonna do. Girl’s gotta squee.

I don’t have Bound by Lust (edited by the smoking-hot Shanna Germain) in my eager hands yet, but oh, I wish I did! It contains my story “A Few Things to Pick Up On Your Way Home,” aka “Oh Crap, Dayle Wrote Another Stupidly Long Title Again.”*

Aaaaanyway, we-all are doing a blog tour to get you all hot and bothered about the anthology. I hope you’ll wander over to Janine Ashbless’s blog on the 12th to say hi to me, and that you’ll pop in here on the 18th to meet Clarice Clique. Here's the full blog tour list (the first name is the host, the second name is the guest):

June 11
Shanna Germain / Welcome

June 12
Janine Ashbless / Andrea Dale  (hey, that's me!)

June 13
Rachel Kramer Bussel / Sharazade

June 14
Allison Wonderland / Craig Sorensen

June 15
Lisabet / Shanna Germain

June 18
Andrea Dale / Clarice Clique

June 19
Erotica for All / Kristina Wright

June 20
Alison Tyler/ Alison Tyler

June 21
Nikki Magennis / Allison Wonderland

June 22
Kristina Wright / Kristina Lloyd

June 25
Clarice Clique / Justine Elyot
  
June 26
Vida Bailey / Veronica Wilde

June 27
Veronica Wilde / Teresa Noelle Roberts

June 28
TBD / Alana Noel Voth

June 29
Kristina Lloyd / Nikki Magennis

July 2
Jeremy Edwards / Vida Bailey

July 3
Teresa Noelle Roberts / Janine Ashbless

July 4
Dorla Moorehouse / Review & Excerpt

July 5
Justine Elyot / Donna George Storey

July 6
Shanna Germain / Closing 
---
*What? I didn’t use a song title? What…what the hell, man?

Monday, May 14, 2012

Workshop: The Sexy Side of Writing


Now that it’s been officially announced on Dean’s website, I can announce it here…

I’m co-teaching a week-long writing workshop for the Oregon Writers Network! Not only that, but I’m co-teaching with award-winning author (in pretty much every genre) and editor Kristine Kathryn Rusch and amazing urban fantasy author Phaedra Weldon!

~ ~ ~

OCTOBER 20-27, 2012
The Sexy Side of Writing

Everything you need to know about how to write hot, sexy fiction in any genre. Taught by three of the top writers in three different genres, this will be an intense and fun writing workshop. Instructors are Kristine Kathryn Rusch, Phaedra Weldon, and Dayle Dermatis.

Workshop fee is $650.00 and room rate is $50.00 per night.

All fall workshops start at 7PM on the first Saturday and go late on the second Saturday, with travel home on Sunday.

~ ~ ~

Full info is here.

This will be an intense writing workshop; you will get lots of practice! We’re focusing on romance, erotica, and paranormal romance/urban fantasy, but the idea is, as it says above, that you’ll learn how to write a sex scene for any genre. Intense…but it’s also going to be a blast! This will not be a workshop for prudes.

Also, like Dean says on his site, we end up talking business as well—and if you want to know what’s really going on in the world of publishing today, these are the people to talk to. (If you’re not already reading both Kris and Dean’s blogs…or even if you are!)

Feel free to ask me questions, or you can ping Dean directly (which is probably better, because he can talk more about how the workshops are run, get you signed up, etc.).

I’m…well, I’m still struggling with the “I’m not worthy” aspect of this. Kris has been one of my writing mentors for the past ten years, and to be asked to teach a workshop with her is just…gah!

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Happy Mother's Day

1950

1990

(I think she'd shoot me if I posted a recent photo!  ;-D  )

Saturday, May 12, 2012

A serene and overcast Saturday


So far today, I’ve…
  • woken up early with a start to realize the lawn guys are here and I have to unlock the back gate. So much for getting a full 8 hours!
  • made my usual egg-over-medium and brown rice for breakfast
  • assembled a huge vat of spagetti sauce
  • done dishes
  • bought tickets to Def Leppard at the Santa Barbara Bowl (GA! Wooh!)

And on tap for the rest of the day…
  • bootcamp
  • shower
  • grocery and pharmacy runs
  • finish a short story
  • read at least 100 pages of the novel I’m editing (preferably 150 or even 200)
  • vaccuum TV room
  • tidy dining room
  • host Girls’ Night! We’re going to eat spaghetti and watch Thor.
  • maybe relax in the hot tub before bed?

It’s a serene, overcast Saturday, and I’m going to enjoy the fuck out of it!